Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
