I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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