she was so not down for the gang bang
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
