i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
