Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
