At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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