I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
