Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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