They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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