You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
