i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
