would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
