love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
