My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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