Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
