he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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