She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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