Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.

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(513): View more from Ohio

You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.

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(207): View more from Maine

Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...

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(712): View more from Iowa

whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?

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(708): View more from Illinois

bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.

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(305): View more from Florida

After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench

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(804): View more from Virginia

You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future

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