How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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