They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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