allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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