Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
