So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
you win again, gameday.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
