I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
