Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
