Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
