wat bout pragnant strippers??
...so i touched it.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
