I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
