i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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