5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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