party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize