So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize