Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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