why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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