is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
