Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
