Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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