help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
