i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I wish life had little blips of pornography
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I pour the whiskey from now on
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
