Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
