Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
