when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Randomize
