he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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