I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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