so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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