We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
