She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
