i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
