I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
