i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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