I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
